Today, for my Slice of Life post, I decided to share something I’m working on for the Passover seder this coming Friday. I’m generally the one who leads the service, and I’m always looking for ways to make the evening more fun. Because FUN. A few years ago, I started my take on Passover “Tom Switfties” to pepper around the table, and I thought I’d share my list with you. I’d like to think my dad is somewhere looking down on me and groaning in approval. Got any more ideas? Questions about what stuff means? Drop me a comment below!
“We don’t put anything on our matzo,” he said drily.
“Grandma’s matzo balls are just as I remember them,” she recalled heavily.
“Please pass the charoset,” he asked sweetly.
“Do we have to raise our cups AGAIN?” he whined.
“Here we go again with the Hillel sandwich,” he complained bitterly.
“But you need olives on the seder plate,” she pressed.
“Oy! Gefilte fish again!?” she carped.
“Hmm. I didn’t think peas were Pesadik,” he snapped.
“I give this seder one star,” he yelped.
“And this is the point where Moses comes with the Israelites to the Red Sea,” she imparted.
“Dayenu is my favorite song,” he noted.
“Perhaps you’d like another pillow?” she inclined.
“Thank goodness Passover joke day is after tax day,” she declared.
“It’s so wonderful to have all of the family here,” he related.
“It’s getting drafty with that door for Elijah open,” he vented.
“I’ve got the afikomen money right here in this envelope,” she flapped.
“C’mon! This Passover seder could go much more efficiently,” he expressed.
“Man, we’re not gonna be done ‘til the sun comes up,” he mourned.
“I bet the matzos are bigger in Texas,” she stated.
“This discussion is getting way too academic for me,” he professed.
Soapbox: The Way I see Things 