Imagine the scene: 1987, sophomore year of high school, pre-calc class day one. Which means I’m unbelievably young to some of you, and unbelievably old to the rest of you.
Mr. Kaufman, the math teacher, gives a fun day-one quiz to the class: “Finite or Infinite?” It all goes quite smoothly until he asks about grains of sand on earth.
To me, the answer is that the number of grains of sand on earth are finite. Yes, the number is a LOT. Yes, that number is perhaps uncountable. Yes, it’s possible that more and more rocks will erode into sand, making more grains. But there is a limit.
Mr. Kaufman does not agree.
And I, in my highly pedantic*, adolescent brain, cannot let that go. In fact, I proceed to hijack his lesson to argue with the poor unsuspecting man for what seems an eternity (one could even say an infinite amount of time!). Back and forth we go until he tells me, in that I’m-the-teacher-and-you-need-to-knock-it-off-NOW voice we should agree to disagree.
I end my arguing, but am not (nor have I ever been) fully satisfied.
Cut to this morning. I’m puttering around the house, listening to Neil DeGrasse Tyson (admittedly my nerd crush) answer listener questions on the latest Star Talk podcast episode. And what’s the very last question he answers?
“Are there any instances of infinity in the observable universe?”
His answer? Maybe the multiverse? Maybe even our universe? And even infinity can be cut into something that’s finite. Notice please, dear reader, that he did NOT say grains of sand.
So. Is this my sweet, sweet vindication after almost forty years of holding a mathematical and philosophical grudge? I’ll take what I can get. Ha!
*Pedantry, n. the quality of being too interested in formal rules and small details that are not important
Thanks, as always, for the Two Writing Teachers March Slice of Life Story Challenge. Check ’em out!
Soapbox: The Way I see Things 
Teachers want, or should want, inquiring minds. That shows interest and learning. Can the grains of sand on the earth be counted? Maybe. Would I want to do it? No way.
So, I have a quibble with you. This argument is not pedantic! And I DO AGREE WITH YOU, even without Tyson’s input. You are and were so totally correct!
Nicely written and I like your “imagine the scene” opening. And your funny observation of age there 🙂
The scene-setting, the call backs to the topic of infinite vs. finite sprinkled throughout–my love for this writing piece is I believe infinite.
I also had a pre-calc teacher named Mr Kaufman and if I had to guess, he’d probably have the same argument. I also really loved the vocab/definition you added, something about it just added to the meaning of the word and the tone of the piece ha. Thanks for sharing.
Lainie,
In fall 1987 I was starting my sixth year teaching. No cell phones. No computers. Only calculators to add grades we recorded in tangible grade books. I, however, have lots of respect for young teachers, so seeing the subject of your post pulled me in, and seeing that line about old vs young kept me here. Yep. Finite grains of sand. If your pre calc teacher is alive, send him that episode and this post. Some of my fondest memories are of students telling other students not to argue w/ me because they “can’t win.”
I am amused with your vindication after all these years. I hope your teacher went home thrilled to have such an engaged student in his class! What a fun story!