Today marks Day 15 of the Slice of Life challenge. Join me as I work to write every day in March -and beyond!
For the past week and a half, I’ve been feeling…OFF.
My mental magic wheel greedily spun comments, omissions, and small slights into threads – ropes! – of hurt, self-doubt and bruised ego.
I usually feel resilient. I can usually manage the “speed bumps” that life throws my way.
But lately I’ve been crabby. I’ve been overly sensitive. The tiniest nudge sends my mind into fits of perseverating.
What on earth was going on? It wasn’t the time change. It wasn’t hormones. It wasn’t the full moon. I had no way of explaining why I couldn’t get my emotional self together.
Until yesterday. Yesterday, I got myself behind a barbell for the first time in a while.
Between the new puppy, vaccine #2, some back issues and an unexpected home quarantine, I had neglected to get physically active. Other than walking said puppy, my body wasn’t doing ANYTHING.
But after a session moving big and heavy things, It felt GOOD. REALLY good. And all throughout the rest of the day, I felt good. I felt so much better, so much more in control, so much more resilient.
This has happened to me before. I’ve felt terrible about this world and everything in it, only to feel much better once I get myself moving.
I wish this week’s me could go back to last week me mid-mind spin. I wish I could interrupt, could tell myself that all of these terrible thoughts I’m having about me aren’t ME. That I need a physical outlet so I can feel better. Sometimes, all we have to do is to identify what we’re going through, to name the monster that’s taking over. It doesn’t fix the problem, but boy does it make it more manageable.
In the meantime, if you’re one of those people who interact with me in real life, I’ll leave you with this:
1) Thank you for putting up with my being a crabby pants.
2) If I’m being a super crabby pants, you have permission to when I worked out last.
3) It will be better for us all.
4) And thank you.